Speaker 1:                           00:07                     [inaudible].

Speaker 2:                           00:07                     What kind of progress have you made in stopping your unwanted sexual behavior? Have you started figuring out your routine so you can put up healthy boundaries? What about practicing brace? When a sexual thought begins to preoccupy your thinking? These are all important steps that you need to take to win the freedom fight, but these three are just the beginning. I’ve seen guys go years without acting out because they had good boundaries and accountability, but because they never address the core issues driving their addiction, it always came back. It’s like mowing a yard full of weeds. It looks great at first, but they always grow back because their roots weren’t dealt with in the same way. The root issues that are driving the sexual addiction cycle must be addressed head on in order to have lasting freedom. There are five factors driving the sexual addiction cycle.

Speaker 2:                           01:01                     The first is an addicted brain. We’ve started looking at the brain and we’ll continue to unpack key elements that we need to know about the neuroscience of addiction and how to renew our minds. Secondly, our sexualized society. The fact that triggers are all around us that are accepted or encouraged is something that we must navigate with effective boundaries in order to walk in freedom. The third factor is the pain and discomforts of life. As we mentioned earlier, sex addiction isn’t about sex as much as it’s about how we medicate the negative emotions of life. The pressures, stresses, and anxieties of life are all the normal emotions that any healthy person will experience, but in our overmedicated culture, we are used to medicating the pain. Instead of facing it. We will give you tools to help you identify and address the emotional triggers in your life.

Speaker 2:                           01:57                     Sometimes the pain of life goes much deeper than the typical discomforts, which is a fourth driver. Traumatic pain, which could include abuse, family dysfunction, or another traumatic experience. Sex addiction becomes a solution for the anxiety and stress of the trauma we experience. If you were abused as a child, I would suggest getting professional counseling in conjunction with continuing the freedom fight. The fifth driver is shame. Guilt says, I have done bad, but shame says I am bad. There is a worthlessness and self-loathing at the core of shame. This shame mentality becomes the default and it can continually trip up the attic from breaking free. There is a sense of shame and every addiction, but it can be particularly severe in sex addiction. The thought of being sexually aroused by things that go against your morals and beliefs regularly lead you back to shame. With each failure, the shame is and becomes the general backdrop of your life.

Speaker 2:                           03:03                     Your self confidence is eroded as you wrestle with your shame. Identity. Secrecy is where shame flourishes in why a small group is so crucial to recovery. When you open up to others about your junk and others still love and accept you, the shame begins to lift. Many sex therapists believe that shame is the strongest of all the drivers. For the majority of sex addicts, shame dominates their identity. Those who follow Jesus had the opportunity to build their identity in Christ instead of in their shame. One of the reasons it’s so important to deal with the roots of sexual addiction is because not only will it probably come back, but if it doesn’t, the attic often finds another way to cope. It’s not surprising that there are a lot of cross addictions that the recovering sex addict can fall into, like overeating, alcoholism, gambling, gaming, dealing with the roots of the addiction is the only way to gain the lasting freedom that you want. In addition to stopping the behaviors, the routines, and the fantasies, we’re going to focus on understanding and healing the addicted brain, navigating our sexualized society with effective boundaries, learning how to face the discomforts of life instead of medicating them and healing the traumatic pain and shame. These are the different aspects of sex addiction recovery that we’re going to zero in on for the rest of the series. I trust this gives you hope to know where we’re headed and that many have found freedom on this path.

Speaker 1:                           04:44                     [inaudible].

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